don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
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