I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
third nipple confirmed
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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