oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize