they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
a search helicopter?!
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
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