Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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