I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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