Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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