he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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