it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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