I will die if light touches me.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize