You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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