it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
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She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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