At least make sure they are 18
Why
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize