Farmville is her only friend.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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