before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
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He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
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