So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he injected his testicle?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize