Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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