I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize