I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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