The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
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Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
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We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
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