finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize