Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  come over anyways, right now, right this second

  (850): View more from Florida

  it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying

  (561): View more from Florida

  wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): come over anyways, right now, right this second (850): it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying (561): wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation http://tfl.nu/cwsr
  Replies (28) Good night (752) Bad night (2936)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets. http://tfl.nu/8b9j
  Replies (11) Good night (5063) Bad night (950) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby" http://tfl.nu/q8vs
  Replies (54) Good night (1817) Bad night (4546) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed. http://tfl.nu/g7od
  Replies (17) Good night (858) Bad night (3643) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in. http://tfl.nu/63c6
  Replies (39) Good night (4152) Bad night (778) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now. http://tfl.nu/yhp5
  Replies (26) Good night (1325) Bad night (6929) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened... http://tfl.nu/apd0
  Replies (17) Good night (5775) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in. http://tfl.nu/k2ap
  Replies (11) Good night (3843) Bad night (1096) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen http://tfl.nu/f9bs
  Replies (4) Good night (3620) Bad night (1277) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner. http://tfl.nu/f3ww
  Replies (14) Good night (5354) Bad night (617) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  My vibrator challenges you to a duel.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): My vibrator challenges you to a duel. http://tfl.nu/fz14
  Replies (18) Good night (3773) Bad night (932) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that. http://tfl.nu/9ytt
  Replies (12) Good night (1242) Bad night (451) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there... http://tfl.nu/mklp
  Replies (5) Good night (725) Bad night (1633) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss. http://tfl.nu/zse5
  Replies (4) Good night (419) Bad night (1120) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark? http://tfl.nu/5sw5
  Replies (2) Good night (234) Bad night (480) Order T-Shirt

Randomize