She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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