HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
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