Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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