frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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