Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize