I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize