I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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