He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize