Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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