i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
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I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
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He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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