Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
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