the day after is always just damage control
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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