I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
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