Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
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I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
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Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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