Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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