Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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