so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I can't turn off my feet"
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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