She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize