dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
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