people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
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Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
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You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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