it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
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he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
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I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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