I must be too annoying 4 u.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize