I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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