We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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