question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize