When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize