I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize