at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize